OK….been a while. Been a bit busy with this and that!! Soooooooooo…..let me see………….
Valentines Day went well….we don’t usually bother. Or should I say, Ricky doesn’t usually bother and I pretend I don’t care either!! I always get him some chocolates though….. some years he has launched into the “I hate being dictated to by commercialism, I will buy you something when I want to not when I am told to….blah, blah, blah. Last year I got roses delivered to work!! That was pretty cool. I had been going through a bad patch though and I think pity and guilt got to him last year. This year I got a huge suprise. He remembered me pointing out something in the shop window when we were waiting for his parents to turn up at the Chinese restaurant. That was a few weeks ago. He went and brought it and gave it to me for Valentines day!!! It is a dragonfly….I just liked it’s simplicity and form and it really caught my eye…….I now have it sitting on my bedhead………he is turning soft in his old age!!!
Now for Sunday……..
We decided to take the dogs and go for a Sunday drive. We went to where we built our first little house on the river and were amazed at how the trees we had planted had shot up. We then went down to the river/picnic area and let the dogs have a swim and a run around. Here is me………..spot the dog bums…..they walked away just as he took the photo………….
Then we went to Sheffield (The town of murals). We used to live there too. It was a beautiful day and we walked around the streets having a sticky beak and checking out what was new or changed since we lived there. Then we decided to treat ourselves to a drink and something to eat at one of the little cafes there. We got a table outside on the footpath…………………THAT’S WHEN THE TROUBLE STARTED!!!!!!!!!!!
Decided to go all out and ordered a lime spider each and a toasted sandwich. The spiders came out first and the lovely lady brought a big bowl of water for the dogs. It was delicious!! I suppose I had drunk about half my spider by the time the sangas came out. The dogs were loving it. Plenty to look at….heaps of tourists about and every 2nd person stopped and admired the dogs and gave them a pat. Harry was in heaven. A horse and cart went up the street and Scarlett had a pink fit over that!! Harry just hid behind Ricky’s chair. Other dogs walked past with their parents and Scarlett did more pink fitting and Harry did more hiding. A man that lives in Sheffield takes his Llama on a leash up the town too…….bit of a tourist thing. He has a little donation box around it’s neck. Everyone stops and pats it and has their photo taken with it. This is what the llama looked like……
This isn’t actually THE llama…..but this one is the same colour and looks like it.
So, I take maybe three bites of my ham, cheese and onion sanga and THAT’S WHEN THE TROUBLE STARTED!! I said to Ricky “My God, I am in so much pain!!” And I mean…..I was IN SO MUCH PAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I could hardly breathe and I honestly thought I was going to die! (OK…I knew I wasn’t….but it FELT like it!)
Then the bloody spider and sanga came bubbling up! Oh My God!!! I was out in the open….in bloody public. I grabbed a very thin, flimsy paper serviette and took off around the corner. There was a little laneway/drive at the side of the cafe. Ricky was going, “Are you alright? What’s wrong?” He was really panicking. Not as much as me. I couldn’t answer him because my mouth was full of bloody lime spider and bits of sandwich. Opening my mouth was NOT an option!! It was farking gross!!! It was coming up into my nose and I could actually feel it bubbling in my throat like a farking volcano about to erupt!! Green lava…….eeewwwwwwwww
In the meantime the llama started walking in our direction on OUR side of the street. I forgot I had Scarlett tied to my chair and when she saw I had disappeared around the corner she threw another pink fit and took off after me!!! So, I am trying to be inconspicuous with a serviette shoved over my mouth hiding behind a bush in a laneway and here comes a farking runaway Jack Russell dragging an aluminium chair behind her into the laneway!!!!
Clatter, clatter clunk, clunk………don’t leave me Mum……don’t leave me!!!! I was going to open my mouth and spew but there was windows on the bloody side of the cafe facing the laneway. I discreetly shoved the serviette into a bush and frantically looked around for somewhere else to retreat to while I rounded up Scarlett and the bloody chair. I wondered where Ricky was and why he had let her take off………….with the chair.
Well, he was having his own dramas!! He also had Harry tied to his chair……..so he explained later…..he couldn’t get the lead untied quickly enough to grab Scarlett and he couldn’t jump up because Harry would have taken off with his chair also. AND BESIDES…..the farking llama had come over to Harry and Harry had panicked (because he is the bravest dog in the world?) and tipped over the water bowl and went in and around and under the chair trying to get away from the llama because it had “snorted” at him!!!! AND…….poor Harry wet himself. Well, in his defence….it WAS a farking big llama…….compared to him anyway 🙂
All the while I was making like a bloody lime coloured fountain ornament and going blue in the face with my mouthful of spider and more trying to bubble up!! It was then I realised the cafe had a toilet inside the building………I headed straight for that. A lady tried to talk to me…..I just raced past her. She must have thought I was a rude bitch! She was going on about how cute Scarlett was!!!……..If she only knew what a farking little bitch that dog can be!!!! LIKE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!! Ricky was still saying “Are you all right? What’s wrong???” while he is trying to untangle Harry from around HIS chair!!
I got to the toilet and just opened my mouth and it came gushing out. What a relief! So, I went back out and explained to Ricky what had happened and was about to tell him off for not grabbing Scarlett until he pointed to the upturned water bowl and the little “puddle” behind his chair. If someone had a video of that they would have made a fortune I’m sure 🙂 So, we made a hasty retreat and decided to go straight back to the car before any more drama unfolded. Scarlett was snorting like a little pig and pulling on the lead…..she had worked herself up into such a bloody frenzy that she had one of her doggy asthma attacks!! In her little dog world horses, other dogs, llamas and her mother abandoning her was just too much in one day!!
We ended up at my parents house where we had a nice, relaxing bbq lunch and some cool NOT FIZZY drinks!! I have learnt a lesson ….. no fizzy drinks followed by food….and slow down, slow down!!!! Bloody band!!!! Love it 🙂
Oh….and Harry the Braveheart…..Llama slayer of the highest order turned five!!!! I had a little party for him when the family came over for a bbq lunch the other weekend……………………
Here he is about to tuck into the mince and carrot patty cakes with cheese slice “sails” and chops for garnish 🙂 They didn’t get the chop bones though….too dangerous. Karen’s dog, Gloria and Alice came to his party. Alice is throwing herself on the ground here because she was jealous it wasn’t all about her! And there was definitely NO red cordial for Scarlett!!! 🙂